Honk honk, Alpha Ape

From talking to people far and wide, the issue I implore you to discuss with me is one which has repurcutions felt not only nationally, but worldwide.


That got your attention right?

The issue I deliberate on is the alpha ape vehicle driver. We all know them, we see them day in and day out whisking their through traffic just daring you to challenge them. No I use the none gender specific description of ape as I have found no links between gender and this type of road rage. In fact, equality advocates would probably class it as a win.

An example, if you will. Whilst driving into the city centre the other day I stopped at a red light and waited my turn. It was rush hour and the traffic crossing in front of my was moving slowly, but as the traffic lights changed, my path was clear. As I accelerated – and even accelerated is a dramatic turn of phrase for how fast my car moved – a gentleman, who had been stuck in the right hand turn side of his lane (to go in my direction) put pedal to the metal, and like a bat out of hell charged towards the front side of my car as I passed.
I stopped my car, which as I said – was not moving very fast, and allowed this imbecile to go in front. Fine? Sure. I was quite happy with the outcome, having trained myself recently to drive defensively at all times, no matter what happens. What I was not prepared for was the barracking I received off the driver I let in. His face contorted in a painful grimace, hands gesticulating in what can only be described as the Devils Macarena and I assume a torrent of foul language, as I could not hear him, spewing from his fetid mouth.

I could not understand why I had irked him so much, but it quickly dawned on me which sin I had committed. Merely being there on the road and becoming an obstacle as the gentleman ran his red light was the fuse to blow the dynamite.

I have com to the decision that it is lack of intelligence that leads to this behaviour. It’s the ultimate one up man ship as these white van drivers, taxi drivers, daily commuters and school runners just think that they are better than everyone else. Quite happy to take other people’s lives in their hands just to gain a second on their journey time.

As mentioned earlier, it is not a bespoke trait for men either and sometimes the abuse you get off women would make the biggest of hard face men quiver in their 110’s.

I think for now I will sit back and let the world go mad by itself. Life is far too short.
What are your experiences with these sorts of drivers? Or what do th think could be done to stop them?

Five steps to become the perfect adult: Growing up made easy!

Charlie Brown, eternally relevant.
Charlie Brown, eternally relevant.

I wish that this was a book that someone had written.


That way, through my meandering browsing of amazon and other book sites, blogs and reviews, I may have stumbled across it and been able to handle the situation that I am in now.

Or rather was in.

You see, as I sit here on my lunch break in the midst of a video format situation in work, the bell has tolled and we have escaped unscathed. I had written around 300 words of foreboding, talking about adult responsibility and how the stress of this situation was pretty crushing. However, and interesting enough I have learnt a lesson within the last 15 minutes and it is one that I am eager to share on my first blog post to this site.


I work as a Video Production Assistant for a goods company (selling microwaves, fridges, freezers). We film product videos and how to videos and recipe videos. It’s enjoyable work, and I love the editing side of it. We also take on projects for external clients – and this is the part where the elephant eats your picnic. We had huge issues with formatting when trying to submit a piece of work for television broadcast. This was an area that is completely new to us and even more so to me being pretty fresh-faced out of university.

As the problems arose and clients became flustered the pressure was mounting until this morning, then it peaked at an insane amount of foreboding. We had one last chance – once more into the breach. We had tried everything and my extensive research into formatting was well and truly at a dead-end. The fork in the road lead to two dead ends and we had no where else to go.

My previous post was about realising my responsibility as an adult and an employee in this mess. I was going to write about how I now realised what it means to have responsibility, in the face of the company losing a significant amount of money on this project. Not to mention the time the team has taken to complete this task.  We were worried. I’m not gonna lie. And, they really pushed it to the limit in sending us the feedback.

This time, we survived.

Our last battle had routed the enemy, through sheer will power we persevered and we were victorious!

There was a collective in take of breath, then – elation.

So, now I propose a new angle on responsibility.

Maybe, unknown to me, I had become responsible. Maybe the time spent researching formatting options and trawling through video tech geeks forums was  me being responsible? However it happened – I have grown up. This experience has shown me that if you want something enough then you can get it. Responsibility it something that you are given, whether you want it or not, it’s how you deal with it that is going to show people who you really are.

Now, I feel confident. I feel confident in my ability to knuckle down and solve the problem. Even with no knowledge – and to interject for a moment, I don’t believe I have any more knowledge of formatting for television – you can grapple and scrap and grit your teeth and persevere.

The proverbial they say “Rome wasn’t built in a day” when talking about persevering and creating great work.

What they fail to mention is a lesson that I believe is more fundamental to this story. If you take anything from this blog, it should be this.

Rome began with the laying of a single stone.

This message follows the idea of getting your foot in the door. Having that first step, that first idea of “I’m here, what the hell am I going to do” and just going with it. Building upon the foundations of your character and letting yourself grow. If you are in a situation where you think everything if getting too much or you are inexperienced – afraid even. Understand that no matter how long you feel out of your depth, eventually you will rise. Then one day you will look back and realise that all those hours spent worrying and searching endless places for solutions to problems you can’t comprehend are not wasted. They are the building blocks to your life. Your tools in taking on your responsibility.

That’s my story for today. A little heavy, but it reflects the atmosphere that I have been engulfed in for the past week. I hope you enjoyed it and will be back for future posts which will be happier, light-hearted, young adult word splurge.